well now that finals are over, I finally have some time to post! I finished finals last week..which was sooo stressful, but I made it through with my lowest grade of an 88 overall! so I can definitely deal with that. I came home Saturday night and it is so so nice to be home! Juan came home with me and came with us to get our Christmas tree! I had to take him to the airport today which sucked. he's 12 hours (by plane) away from me ): but in a month i'll get to see him again! so I guess i'll live.
anyways, things with body image have been horrible. today, my dad told me that I look "so good" and I feel "like I should." I know he means it in the best, most caring way possible, but I can't help feeling like I've gained so much weight and am just so heavy. I don't know...I just feel like I need to lose weight. I have wanted to crawl out of my skin lately and it's a horrible feeling. i'm not sure what to do.
i'm hoping that with time i'll get used to where i'm at. I know that I feel so much better than I have and I have so much energy. but it still is really tough to be at the highest weight I've ever been at. I wish I had an idea of how to accept myself and the weight i'm at..
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